I have a lot to do in the next few weeks. I unfortunately have my econ midterm on Tuesday. This midterm season isn't as painful because unlike last semester where I had to take 3 midterms this time of the year, I only have 1 midterm this time and 3 semester-long projects. Although the projects require more work, they don't stress you out as much because you can deal with them as the semester goes on. However, my projects are crappy, so we'll see what happens with that.

I've also got one last shot at finding a job/internship at Berkeley's "Just In Time" job fair. I've basically put off trying to find a job or internship until late April, which has pretty much screwed me over because I have little work experience while people are out finding their 12th Internship and curing cancer in their spare time. They might as well call it the "Nice job you Jackass" job fair, because it's going to be filled with guys like me who waited all this time to find something to do in the summer. I missed the last job fair because I didn't even know about it until the email for it came a few hours after it ended. However, I hope to be Just In Time and find something productive to do this summer. I really have no idea where I'm going to apply to, or even how to approach it. I've never been to a job fair, and only had a few interviews before. I'm not very good at sucking up either. I might even consider pulling an Office Space and just being straight up and honest. "Sir, my name is Allan. I don't really know anything about your company nor do I even want to work this summer, but I hear that you're looking for Econ majors, so here I am." I doubt the honesty approach will work but maybe I'll do it with a company I know I don't have a shot with.

My summer plans basically revolve around this job fair. There are a few things I might consider, such as that Ebay store at Lakeshore Plaza because I know that's something I'd enjoy and know about already. But the bad thing is it probably won't lead me to a full time job in the future like an internship might. Plus I'm sure Garson and Shirley wouldn't want me to take that job because I'd just walk over to their house during my breaks and stare into their window to see if anybody was home. I also applied to Walgreens Management Internship online but I screwed up the online application. The application wouldn't let me go backwards, which was bad because I skipped the previous employer information thinking I could go back later and fill in everything. Not only did the application not let me go backwards, but it wouldn't let me delete it or start a new application because they kept saying I have an existing application already. So I kept going forward with the application thinking there would be a checklist at the end, but it ended up just being sent. Uh, thanks Walgreens. I guess that's how you filter out your internship applicants, you just see who can fill out an online application correctly. Guess I'm not qualified.

The other alternatives for my summer are math camp or doing voiceovers with Ben. I don't mind doing math camp, because I heard all the stories of people who gave up their summers for God and were eventually rewarded for it. Plus I would be able to go on some trips this summer, and to go watch a lot of day games at the ballparks. Finding work this summer isn't a do-or-die thing, but it would be nice. Please spread the word that I'm free for a job this summer if you know somebody who needs an unqualified college student with low self esteem and lacks potential in life (that's taken straight from my resume). I'll even be a poolboy if someone needs one.

I went to a "workshop" specifically for this job fair, where they tell you what you should do and how to prepare for it. It felt like detention. It was me and about 10 other loser misfits who haven't gotten around to thinking about their future until April 13, 2006. Whenever the workship leader asked questions about who has interned before, I think two people raised their hand. The rest of us were just looking at each other trying to figure out which one of us is the dumbest in the room.

My stupid umbrella broke. The wind came from behind me and flipped my umbrella inside out so that it looked like a tulip. Then I couldn't get it back to normal, so I walked around with a half opened umbrella because if I fully opened it, everyone would see my umbrella was inside out. Plus an inside out umbrella doesn't even repell water, but it just collects it like a wine glass. What a loser umbrella.

I've invented a new phrase. It's called "Pulling a Shaq". Pulling a Shaq is when someone tries to shoot something into the waste basket, such as a ball of paper or a piece of food, because they want to look cool and impress everyone in the room, but they end up missing badly. We've all seen it happen, or perhaps it's happened to us. And the closer we are and miss, the more embarassing it is. Let's be honest, the only reason people do it is because if they make it, they impress everybody. "Wow, nice shot Tony!" And when you miss, you usually hear the "Aww, nice try. You'll get it next time." But deep down inside, you're laughing at yourself when you see the guy miss the shot, especially when he's two feet away and hits something near the trash can instead, like a window or a couch. And missing leaves you with a problem: you can either leave your garbage on the floor and possibly be called a litterbug, or pick up the garbage and acknowledge that you missed. Most of us have too much pride and choose the litterbug option, hoping that nobody saw us, but that also leaves you exposed to the Loudmouth, who was the one person who noticed that you missed and tells you to pick up your trash. That annoucement will then leave everybody aware that you missed the shot and you're a litterbug. Reputations can be ruined, and relationships can be ended. Beware of "Pulling a Shaq."

Here's some more Chappelle.