First and foremost, I hope to witness history today at the Giants game vs. the Cardinals. Bonds is going to break Ruth today, and I will be there to witness it. I was actually hoping he didn't hit one on Monday because watching him hit #716 is worthless. I want #715. Ben said if the ball comes between us, he agreed I could keep the ball if he gets to keep the "bat and syringe." We have a deal Ben. However, we have Upper Reserve seats in foul territory, so it makes catching a homerun ball a lot harder. Maybe I'll walk over to McCovey Cove's area during his at-bats so I can be mangled, assulted, and violated trying to catch it.

I haven't accomplished anything this summer. I was up until 2AM watching some Decoding the Da Vinci Code show on the History Channel. You can tell how desperate I was to find something to watch when I check out the History Channel. Up until last night, I didn't even know what channel number the History Channel was on. Although I've yet to read the book, I thought the show was pretty interesting. It basically showed the weak points to Dan Brown's book.

I was also switching back and forth between that show and Twins on AMC. That's a good movie too. I didn't know Devito was so short. He's like a little muffin.

I was also watching Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. That show was ahead of its time. It's like 10 years old and it's still funny. How many shows can actually be funny 10 years later? It was an episode with a young Queen Latifah. The only other "old" show I watch is Boy Meets World, which was ahead of its time too. Although I don't like the newer episodes as much, because I start to question Shawn and Corey's, um, heterosexual friendship. I'll leave it at that.

There's actually a lot of good stuff to watch on tv during the 1AM-7AM period when the world is sleeping. Here are some of the great things you can catch on tv, as I've broken them up into categories:

For the entrepreneurs
Thinking about getting rich? Just watch the infomerical about using eBay to get rich. It's happened to so many, why not you? Or how about timeshares, ever think about that? Or lastly, invest in real estate with those two little twin brothers. They're pretty shady looking, but if they say you can be rich, it must be true.

For the music lovers
Ironically, the time frame where nobody watches, 1AM-7AM, is exactly the time MTV and VH1 show stuff which was their original intent, music videos. Music videos got kicked out by stupid shows like Yo Mama where you can win "cash money", but there's nothing like waking up at 5AM and watching Shakira music videos as she shakes on the floor. You'd think she was having seizures if you weren't familiar with her.

For the show lovers
5AM has a lot of good shows, for example, Saved by the Bell. A little AC Slater and a bit of Screech is enough to entertain you for 30 minutes.

For the food lovers
Tired of having to use a knife to chop all your food. Just purchase a Magic Bullet from some weird British guy with a thick accent and some chick in a dress. Or if you like pellets of meat inside your hams and turkeys, go buy Ronco's products with that crazy injector thing so that you can displace all sorts of stuff into your dinner meat.

For the Lazy Bastards
Want to get as buff as Chuck Norris? Go buy yourself a Bowflex machine. If all those enormous guys with bulging muscles have trouble with that machine, you know that you have no chance.

For the Sentimental Saps
Wish you could go back in time and relive that magic with your first love? Well now you can with Time Life music collections. They have all the oldies. Remember Starship? The Temptations? REO Speedwagon? The Everly Brothers? Ricky Martin? Yup, they're all here, and available for just 3 easy payments.

For the, uh, adventurous
Don't you just hate it when you're at the beach and girls flash you? Yea, me too. But if you like that kind of stuff, then Girls Gone Wild has a deal for you. But I wouldn't know about this series, because I don't buy those videos...